Carroll

Heaven was knocking on the door and was determined to remove her from our sight whether we were ready – or not.  Sorrow, grief, and even joy for a better place permeated the room and my thoughts – then.. a heavy numbing haze filled me as I watched her earthly air-breathing fade.

…as each day passed without her, the true realization that she was no longer here began to invade almost my every thought.  Each event or site I encountered provided a basis for a memory or remembrance.  So many times since her passing I have felt the piercing pain – I miss her voice, her touch, her presence, her countenance.  Then God reminds me that these are selfish, carnal feelings.  And while my flesh weeps, my heart and soul are filled with the Holy Spirit, and I envision a young, vibrant, feisty woman living in a beautiful mansion with roses growing in abundance – and she smiles a loving smile .. and I too can smile as I am comforted by this vision and in knowing that our Heavenly Father has His arms wrapped gently around her.

As my thoughts focus on her, I am also reminded of the fears she voiced those final weeks – and I realize now that she was not afraid to die.  She knew that her blessings were just beginning.. but (as usual) she was (afraid for) worried about each of us, and she was trying to allay our fears of losing her.

While I strained with the grief of her loss and the joy of her Heavenly ascension, I felt compelled to try and define the powerful presence she had in my life..but I couldn’t seem to find the words.  I struggled to tie meaningful sentences together, and it occurred to me that the grandest tribute to Frances Young was to let her spirit live through me; to embrace her strengths and tap into that character which she emanated and instilled in each of us.  

I don’t mean: be Frances .  What I am proposing and challenging each of us – is to recognize a weak trait in ourselves (or one that could be enhanced) and gain strength from her.  I am not suggesting that she was perfect – none of us are – but she did have some splendid, grand, and powerful qualities.  She may have been the strongest person I have ever known.  She knew no walls, no impediments – there were merely obstacles to climb over, go around – or maybe even knock down and go through.  She was a woman of strong morals and Christian, family values …and the list goes on.  I do not presume to be able to pay true homage to her in a literary way.  For me, the way to remember Frances Young best and with the most reverence is to persevere – to thank God for each precious day that He gives us, to each day tenderly love those we hold dear, to endeavor to become a better person each day, and to gently place Frances’ memory in our hearts so that she becomes part of us.  A quote from Grandma’s e-mail: “God has not allowed us one thing a lot of us at my stage of life want more than anything.. we cannot go back, even for one day.  Your life is like an un-bound book with page one on the bottom.  Each day another page is placed on top of the page before.  God has written the forward.. I have to write on this page.  I don’t know if I will get another page. This has to be a good page.”

I’m not sure if anyone will find comfort with what I have shared, but for me it has been cathartic.  I was powerfully blessed to have known Velma Frances Reaves Young, and I pray that I too can make a difference in the lives of those I love.

Leslie
(Her oldest grand-daughter)

Collecting Our Kin: A Family History Collection, copyright 1998-2010, is a not-for-profit, personal, on-line genealogy project, formatted and presented by James H. Carroll, Goodlettsville, TN.  Excerpts and contributions from other sources have been used sparingly and with appropriate credit given. You are welcome to copy information found at this site for personal use and share information with other researchers or genealogical organizations, but this information may not be sold or used in a commercial project without expressed permission.